Well so far this week has been a good week. Saturday night we had a stake adult meeting so I got a babysitter and Rich and I went to that and then out to dinner afterwards. I have really badly chapped lips from going to the dentist and keeping my mouth open for so long without the chapstick that I normally put on them beforehand. So... I wasn't really thinking about them when we went to a Mexican place for dinner. I enjoy mexican, but I don't like a lot of spicy hot stuff- mild is more my level of enjoyment. I decided to try a dish and thought it looked like it would be a little spicier than mild, but not too bad. So I got it. I was really good, but my lips were burning and on fire... It came with two flat bread taco's and I traded with Rich and gave him one after I finished the first, and took his plain taco from his combo plate because my lips couldn't handle another taco while they were burning. lol!
Sunday we made the choice to just have the two older kids go to Stake Conference with Rich and for me to stay home with the two little kids. Rich said it was a great broadcast that the Prophet spoke at and I was a little sorry to have missed it, but I know I probably would have been out in the hallway with one of the little girls if I had gone anyway.
I think the biggest reason this week is going well is because I had a relaxing Sunday, and because I'm making a stronger effort to exercise daily than I have in the recent past. I had a really good workout yesterday and today and am feeling really good about things.
The one downer this week has been that Rich and I's computer died on us. We have an older computer that we have loaded with stuff for the kids so we still have internet access, but I don't have access to any of my bookmarks or my email addresses... so if you read this and have a blog of your own that I haven't been commenting on... it's because I can't get to it... :) I don't have the links right now. Once we get a new computer or fix the one that's dead I'll have them again... but until then that's why I'm quiet. :)
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Friday, February 23, 2007
Update on chores
I posted a while back about my new plan for chores for the kids. I have to say that parts of it have worked really well and other parts are still "works in progress". Last week when the kids were sick, we didn't really enforce any chores, but this week we've gotten back to them. Alex and Ashley are doing a great job at helping clear the dishes at night and help clean up the kitchen. They haven't quite gotten into the habit of making their bed, but their rooms are generally more picked up and I'm not seeing the piles of clothes on their floors that I was seeing before (though there may be piles hiding under stuff... I haven't investigated yet this week). They are taking care of their clothes more and instead of just tossing everything in the hamper they are thinking and looking at it to see if it is clean or dirty and putting it away correctly. They've realized the more clothes they toss in the hamper, the more clothes they have to put away after I've cleaned them. In a few more months when school is out they are going to start folding their clothes and sorting them too instead of just putting them away after they are sorted and folded. :)
They are responding pretty good to the group clean up effort in the afternoons. I've been trying to keep the little kids from having toys all over the front room before the big kids get home from school, so then the big kids are just asked to help the little ones pick up a few toys each night and it is a lot easier for them to feel that sense of accomplishment of doing the job together.
We still have a long way to go, but I'm excited that this time we seem to be working harder and it seems to be helping us change our habits and incorportate cleaning into our days without it being the power struggle it has been in the past.
They are responding pretty good to the group clean up effort in the afternoons. I've been trying to keep the little kids from having toys all over the front room before the big kids get home from school, so then the big kids are just asked to help the little ones pick up a few toys each night and it is a lot easier for them to feel that sense of accomplishment of doing the job together.
We still have a long way to go, but I'm excited that this time we seem to be working harder and it seems to be helping us change our habits and incorportate cleaning into our days without it being the power struggle it has been in the past.
My own trials of late
I love my children. I really really really do love my children. They are smart, beautiful, funny, and can turn me to mush with their hugs and kisses and funny antics. I am so fortunate to be able to be at home with them and play with them and teach them and spend so much time with them. They are normal kids and have good times and bad times. The scale is usually balanced between the good and the bad, but lately I've felt the balance tipping more on the bad side and I'm sure that increases my own feeling of being out of balance emotionally myself.
Last week the kids were sick all week and I was able to pull out the emotional reserves and give the love and compassion and sympathy and cuddling and physical and emotional support to them that they needed. This week I've found myself "dried up" with my emotional bucket more.
Angela has not been sleeping well since she was sick, and she has not been napping well at all since we moved her from her crib to a toddler bed. She won't lay down and sleep on it like she would her crib, and I can't get her to take naps until late in the day when it's really too late for her to take a good nap- or else she will be up till midnight or later.
Yesterday I broke down and put her in her room and let her close the door after trying to rock her to sleep for over an hour. She was overtired and over stimulated and I was quite frankly at the end of my rope with her that day. She wouldn't let me rock her to sleep, walk around and soothe her to sleep, or lay down with her to get her to sleep. She had also been up the night before for 2+ hours and we had slept upstairs on the couch after she fell asleep at 4am- so I was running on a short amount of sleep too. She of course cried herself to sleep, but within 10 minutes verses the hour of crying that we had already had while I was trying to soothe her to sleep. She only slept about 15 minutes and then woke up and then I held her and she fell fast asleep on my lap and I sat and held her for an hour while she slept. She woke up the moment I tried to stand up and put her down.
so... when the kids came home from school I was already tired... Alex and Ashley came home and were fighting and bickering, I let them turn on an x-box game hoping that would get them interested and stop fighting, but they still kept fighting. Alyssa walked in front of Ashley and Ashley was screaming at her to get out of the way, so I went to take her controller and give her a time out... which resulted in her kicking Alyssa and screaming more. Alex started screaming, so I turned the x-box off. Then he threw himself on the floor and was seriously throwing a tantrum that is usually a two year old's tantrum... kicking feet and pounding hands. So then I told them that I was fed up with the behaviour and they had lost all electronics- (tv; x-box; gameboy; movies; computer) for the rest of the week. It ended in my pulling out all the plugs and wires from the tv/stereo/xbox/satellite/dvd power strip and tossing the power strip up in my bedroom closet.
We might let them watch a movie with the babysitter Saturday night, but that's it. Monday at FHE we'll reevaluate things and decide on what basis they get some of it back.
So we had that great big blow-up at about 5:30 last night. Lucky for me I had a fridge full of leftovers so I just pulled those and warmed them up while I listened to the kids telling me that they were going to "tell Daddy" on me lol!! I don't know why they were surprised when Rich got home and they told him what happened that he told them he wasn't going to change anything.
Then we actually had a fairly relaxing evening... of course it didn't go completely bump free, but there were no major incidents and the kids went to bed at a decent time. I also went to bed early after the kids were all asleep and I had a little time to unwind.
Angela slept from 8:30 pm till 6:30 this morning... wooo hooo!!! She woke up in a bad mood though... whiney and cranky and clingy. I lost it again this morning when Alex poured a huge bowl of cereal, then tons of milk in it and then drank all the milk out of the bowl and left the cereal in the bowl. We really try to limit his milk because he would only drink milk and not eat anything else if we let him. He has enough problems with congestion and breathing with his allergies and asthma- and the milk makes it worse, so he usually just gets the milk with his cereal each day and occasionally a small glass of milk with dessert or something. So I was upset at him for basically circumventing the rules to get a big glass of milk, and wasting about two bowls worth of cereal to do that- along with Angela screaming and crying and climbing up my arm... Alyssa was whining and upset that the tv was "not working" and was whining and wanting to be held also, and while I was trying to get lunch made for the kids to take to school... and Rich came out of our room from getting himself ready for work and asked what the big deal was... I told him I was tired of fighting Alex on everything, and trying to do things one handed while kids were screaming to be held... and then went to our room.
Rich wisely made the kids lunches and I came out and had let the steam blow off and we got the kids onto the school bus. Of course Angela was still velcro'ed to me and I couldn't put her down. I hooked up the tv for Alyssa and Angela and now it's only taken me an hour to type this up in between getting things for the girls and sitting and watching Charlie and Lola with Angela... ::sigh:: I'll unhook the tv before the big kids get home, but it really was a loss of privileges for the big kids and not Alyssa, so I'm letting her spend some time watching it this morning to just get myself a break...
Last week the kids were sick all week and I was able to pull out the emotional reserves and give the love and compassion and sympathy and cuddling and physical and emotional support to them that they needed. This week I've found myself "dried up" with my emotional bucket more.
Angela has not been sleeping well since she was sick, and she has not been napping well at all since we moved her from her crib to a toddler bed. She won't lay down and sleep on it like she would her crib, and I can't get her to take naps until late in the day when it's really too late for her to take a good nap- or else she will be up till midnight or later.
Yesterday I broke down and put her in her room and let her close the door after trying to rock her to sleep for over an hour. She was overtired and over stimulated and I was quite frankly at the end of my rope with her that day. She wouldn't let me rock her to sleep, walk around and soothe her to sleep, or lay down with her to get her to sleep. She had also been up the night before for 2+ hours and we had slept upstairs on the couch after she fell asleep at 4am- so I was running on a short amount of sleep too. She of course cried herself to sleep, but within 10 minutes verses the hour of crying that we had already had while I was trying to soothe her to sleep. She only slept about 15 minutes and then woke up and then I held her and she fell fast asleep on my lap and I sat and held her for an hour while she slept. She woke up the moment I tried to stand up and put her down.
so... when the kids came home from school I was already tired... Alex and Ashley came home and were fighting and bickering, I let them turn on an x-box game hoping that would get them interested and stop fighting, but they still kept fighting. Alyssa walked in front of Ashley and Ashley was screaming at her to get out of the way, so I went to take her controller and give her a time out... which resulted in her kicking Alyssa and screaming more. Alex started screaming, so I turned the x-box off. Then he threw himself on the floor and was seriously throwing a tantrum that is usually a two year old's tantrum... kicking feet and pounding hands. So then I told them that I was fed up with the behaviour and they had lost all electronics- (tv; x-box; gameboy; movies; computer) for the rest of the week. It ended in my pulling out all the plugs and wires from the tv/stereo/xbox/satellite/dvd power strip and tossing the power strip up in my bedroom closet.
We might let them watch a movie with the babysitter Saturday night, but that's it. Monday at FHE we'll reevaluate things and decide on what basis they get some of it back.
So we had that great big blow-up at about 5:30 last night. Lucky for me I had a fridge full of leftovers so I just pulled those and warmed them up while I listened to the kids telling me that they were going to "tell Daddy" on me lol!! I don't know why they were surprised when Rich got home and they told him what happened that he told them he wasn't going to change anything.
Then we actually had a fairly relaxing evening... of course it didn't go completely bump free, but there were no major incidents and the kids went to bed at a decent time. I also went to bed early after the kids were all asleep and I had a little time to unwind.
Angela slept from 8:30 pm till 6:30 this morning... wooo hooo!!! She woke up in a bad mood though... whiney and cranky and clingy. I lost it again this morning when Alex poured a huge bowl of cereal, then tons of milk in it and then drank all the milk out of the bowl and left the cereal in the bowl. We really try to limit his milk because he would only drink milk and not eat anything else if we let him. He has enough problems with congestion and breathing with his allergies and asthma- and the milk makes it worse, so he usually just gets the milk with his cereal each day and occasionally a small glass of milk with dessert or something. So I was upset at him for basically circumventing the rules to get a big glass of milk, and wasting about two bowls worth of cereal to do that- along with Angela screaming and crying and climbing up my arm... Alyssa was whining and upset that the tv was "not working" and was whining and wanting to be held also, and while I was trying to get lunch made for the kids to take to school... and Rich came out of our room from getting himself ready for work and asked what the big deal was... I told him I was tired of fighting Alex on everything, and trying to do things one handed while kids were screaming to be held... and then went to our room.
Rich wisely made the kids lunches and I came out and had let the steam blow off and we got the kids onto the school bus. Of course Angela was still velcro'ed to me and I couldn't put her down. I hooked up the tv for Alyssa and Angela and now it's only taken me an hour to type this up in between getting things for the girls and sitting and watching Charlie and Lola with Angela... ::sigh:: I'll unhook the tv before the big kids get home, but it really was a loss of privileges for the big kids and not Alyssa, so I'm letting her spend some time watching it this morning to just get myself a break...
Enduring to the end.
A little while ago a friend of mine said this in a conversation.
and even though it was said with a light heart in a funny manner, it really is so true. We can have faith, and have a strong testimony of our Savior and know what is right, and what is wrong. But ultimately we have to endure through our trials, small and large and lean on our Savior to help us reach our goal of returning to live with our Father in Heaven.
I've been battling my own little trials lately. Some mental, some physical- nothing major, just little things. I know I just need to keep my focus steady and endure and lean on my Savior to help me through them.
"you know I get the faith part.... totally am understanding the repentance part and trying daily to do it..... I got the baptism part and even the Holy Ghost part... but it's the enduring part that is going to KILL me "
and even though it was said with a light heart in a funny manner, it really is so true. We can have faith, and have a strong testimony of our Savior and know what is right, and what is wrong. But ultimately we have to endure through our trials, small and large and lean on our Savior to help us reach our goal of returning to live with our Father in Heaven.
I've been battling my own little trials lately. Some mental, some physical- nothing major, just little things. I know I just need to keep my focus steady and endure and lean on my Savior to help me through them.
Friday, February 16, 2007
Silver Linings
I've got one child back at school today.
I feel a little bad about feeling happy that Angela is still a little sick. You see Angela does not take naps on a regular basis every day at a decent time. She is so excited and wants to play with her siblings so much that she just goes and goes and goes and then usually crashes and falls asleep on my shoulder when I'm cooking dinner at 6pm... of course I don't want her to really sleep then because I want her to sleep at night... so I let her sleep for 5 minutes and then wake her up- and try to convince her to be happy and eat dinner with us. Not really something I enjoy, but I have not been able to get her to take naps during the day on a consistent basis for the last few months after we moved her out of her crib.
This week she hasn't been feeling that great and she has taken naps almost every single day. She's also getting into a lot less around the house and I've been able to actually spend time during the day taking care of cleaning and laundry and stuff- normally I try to do all of it in the evening after she goes to sleep, becuase she is just so active I can't leave her alone otherwise...
So... I really am not happy that she's sick, but I am seeing the silver lining that I am actually getting things done this week because she is taking naps that are about 2 hours long. :)
I feel a little bad about feeling happy that Angela is still a little sick. You see Angela does not take naps on a regular basis every day at a decent time. She is so excited and wants to play with her siblings so much that she just goes and goes and goes and then usually crashes and falls asleep on my shoulder when I'm cooking dinner at 6pm... of course I don't want her to really sleep then because I want her to sleep at night... so I let her sleep for 5 minutes and then wake her up- and try to convince her to be happy and eat dinner with us. Not really something I enjoy, but I have not been able to get her to take naps during the day on a consistent basis for the last few months after we moved her out of her crib.
This week she hasn't been feeling that great and she has taken naps almost every single day. She's also getting into a lot less around the house and I've been able to actually spend time during the day taking care of cleaning and laundry and stuff- normally I try to do all of it in the evening after she goes to sleep, becuase she is just so active I can't leave her alone otherwise...
So... I really am not happy that she's sick, but I am seeing the silver lining that I am actually getting things done this week because she is taking naps that are about 2 hours long. :)
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Valentines Day
I have some message boards that I read on and post occasionally. I discovered them when I was nursing my second child and had some problems and needed some information. It is a board comprised of women from every walk of life and social, political, and religious opinions. I just stick to pretty generic topics and the parenting stuff.
Anyhow... yesterday I was surfing around on it more since my kids are all sick and we were having yet another tv/movie day. There were lots of posts of women getting upset over their hubbies not doing the "right thing" for valentines day, or things that were going wrong so their valentines day wasn't going to be this big romantic event. I thought about how I have changed and grown over the years and how my expectations have changed. I've never been a big valentines day person- it just isn't a holiday that is big on my list of holidays I like to play up and celebrate. In the past though I have had a bit of a let down and "self pity" when I haven't been given anything for valentines day. The thing is I am given the love every single day that Valentines day celebrates. I posted on one of the messages where people were asking what we had given and recieved for valentines day:
Anyhow... yesterday I was surfing around on it more since my kids are all sick and we were having yet another tv/movie day. There were lots of posts of women getting upset over their hubbies not doing the "right thing" for valentines day, or things that were going wrong so their valentines day wasn't going to be this big romantic event. I thought about how I have changed and grown over the years and how my expectations have changed. I've never been a big valentines day person- it just isn't a holiday that is big on my list of holidays I like to play up and celebrate. In the past though I have had a bit of a let down and "self pity" when I haven't been given anything for valentines day. The thing is I am given the love every single day that Valentines day celebrates. I posted on one of the messages where people were asking what we had given and recieved for valentines day:
I got a shirt full of puke from my youngest... and a sleepless night from my other darling children.
I gave them love and medicine...
DH will bring us home presents of more medicine, and if I'm lucky I'll get to sleep for a few hours tonight.
Some might have read that as a sarcastic response and that I was upset over valentines day being ruined, but it really wasn't. This year really was a good valentines day- sure it would have been nice if the kids weren't sick and we could have done some more fun things, but they were sick and we didn't, but we still filled the house with love.
Last night Rich spent the night running to the store to pick up meds for the kids, cleaning up the kitchen from dinner and all our dishes we went through during the day, and rebuilding our computer so I wouldn't have so many problems with it. Rich did pick up a package of Oreo's (his and the kids favorite cookie- we've started a little tradition of buying them for special occasions) and he got me a symphony large candy bar- but with everyone sick, only he and Alyssa (the one child that is not sick) ate some Oreo's...
Valentines day this year was special to me. It's not about the gift or the romance all the time, but the quiet solid love that is a foundation.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Yuckies and sickies and more...
Well Alex has been running a fever off and on since Saturday. He's stuffed up, but there isn't anything else that we can figure out. Yesterday Ashley threw up on the bus riding home from from school, and started running a fever. Between her and Alex and Angela I was awake more than asleep last night.
Of course I was supposed to go to the Dentist. I told Rich when he made the appointment for me that something was bound to happen and I'd have to postpone it. We'll see if I get to make the new appointment next week. Hopefully by then everyone will be better, but with my luck I'll be the one sick then. lol!
I'm just waiting for the rest of the kids to get fevers and start throwing up too... I guess I've been lucky that so far we haven't had any really bugs go through the family this winter. Stuffy noses is all we've dealt with up till now.
Blah..... (I need a smilie with my tounge sticking out... lol!)
Of course I was supposed to go to the Dentist. I told Rich when he made the appointment for me that something was bound to happen and I'd have to postpone it. We'll see if I get to make the new appointment next week. Hopefully by then everyone will be better, but with my luck I'll be the one sick then. lol!
I'm just waiting for the rest of the kids to get fevers and start throwing up too... I guess I've been lucky that so far we haven't had any really bugs go through the family this winter. Stuffy noses is all we've dealt with up till now.
Blah..... (I need a smilie with my tounge sticking out... lol!)
Friday, February 09, 2007
Valentines Day is just around the corner
So some friends and I were sharing our engagement stories... It's always fun to look back and remember those times. :)
Rich and I started dating very reluctantly. We got set up on dates twice - once through a church activity where we got paired together and then proceded to ditch each other at the dance at the end of the night, and again through a friend of mine that was looking for someone to go on a double date with him and another girl and I told him to find me a date and I'd go. This was at the end of February. So... after those two dates Rich still wanted to date me, and I had relegated him to the "lets be friends" category.
After the first date I went out with him about once a week, and I just happened to be getting dates with other guys about 2-3 other nights each week. (And I wonder why my grades took a nose dive that semester??? Too much playing??) As I kept going on dates with him, the other guys in our Ward stopped asking me out and after 2 months we were pretty much exclusively dating, but I really didn't see it as serious or anything.
I moved out of the apartment complex we both lived in and out of the ward and to another area near campus, and tried to back off and "free" myself to date other guys too- while still wanting to date Rich. I took off on a vacation with my roomates and came back and realized I did want to date Rich exclusively. Now it was the beginning of May and we started seeing each other on a daily basis after work I would go to his apartment and we would hang out and spend time together until after dinner and then he would walk me home (about 3 miles).
In June I went on another trip with my mom and sister to visit my granny in Nashville. On the trip Rich and I talked daily and he sent me 2 dozen roses at my Granny's house. I got back from the trip on a Saturday, and the next day I went with him to his Grandparents house for the traditional Sunday taco dinner... his cousins and aunt and another relative just happened to be visiting that weekend, along with the family members that lived closeby- so there were a bunch of us sitting outside eating taco's when his 3rd cousin (or something) asked him something in spanish. Rich blushed deep red and then muttered something back to her and she laughed along with his cousin who knew spanish. I nudged him and asked him what that was all about and he told me he would tell me later.
That night we went back to his apartment and were sitting at the table eating dessert and I asked him what his cousin had said... he told me that she had asked him "when are you going to marry that girl?" and then just waited for my reaction. I asked him what he had told her, and he said "When she decides she wants to." I think asked him if he was asking me to marry him? He said "I guess I am". I was honestly completely surprised... I knew I wanted to marry him- we had stopped in Nauvoo on my trip and I had gotten him a "nail ring" which the LDS pioneers used as "intended" rings for a while because they didn't have anything else- and even had it in my pocket ready to give to him, but was so shocked I told the poor boy that I would have to think about it.
I drove back to my apartment and sat in my room for a while and then called all my friends and told them I was going to get married... and then realized that I hadn't told him yet... So I called him and asked him when he wanted to get married... The poor guy thought I was going to say no and had called his mom heartbroken that I was going to reject him...
We went and picked out my ring together and when the ring was sized and ready to be picked up, Rich took my up the canyon for a picnic dinner and asked me to marry him again and gave me the ring.
Rich and I started dating very reluctantly. We got set up on dates twice - once through a church activity where we got paired together and then proceded to ditch each other at the dance at the end of the night, and again through a friend of mine that was looking for someone to go on a double date with him and another girl and I told him to find me a date and I'd go. This was at the end of February. So... after those two dates Rich still wanted to date me, and I had relegated him to the "lets be friends" category.
After the first date I went out with him about once a week, and I just happened to be getting dates with other guys about 2-3 other nights each week. (And I wonder why my grades took a nose dive that semester??? Too much playing??) As I kept going on dates with him, the other guys in our Ward stopped asking me out and after 2 months we were pretty much exclusively dating, but I really didn't see it as serious or anything.
I moved out of the apartment complex we both lived in and out of the ward and to another area near campus, and tried to back off and "free" myself to date other guys too- while still wanting to date Rich. I took off on a vacation with my roomates and came back and realized I did want to date Rich exclusively. Now it was the beginning of May and we started seeing each other on a daily basis after work I would go to his apartment and we would hang out and spend time together until after dinner and then he would walk me home (about 3 miles).
In June I went on another trip with my mom and sister to visit my granny in Nashville. On the trip Rich and I talked daily and he sent me 2 dozen roses at my Granny's house. I got back from the trip on a Saturday, and the next day I went with him to his Grandparents house for the traditional Sunday taco dinner... his cousins and aunt and another relative just happened to be visiting that weekend, along with the family members that lived closeby- so there were a bunch of us sitting outside eating taco's when his 3rd cousin (or something) asked him something in spanish. Rich blushed deep red and then muttered something back to her and she laughed along with his cousin who knew spanish. I nudged him and asked him what that was all about and he told me he would tell me later.
That night we went back to his apartment and were sitting at the table eating dessert and I asked him what his cousin had said... he told me that she had asked him "when are you going to marry that girl?" and then just waited for my reaction. I asked him what he had told her, and he said "When she decides she wants to." I think asked him if he was asking me to marry him? He said "I guess I am". I was honestly completely surprised... I knew I wanted to marry him- we had stopped in Nauvoo on my trip and I had gotten him a "nail ring" which the LDS pioneers used as "intended" rings for a while because they didn't have anything else- and even had it in my pocket ready to give to him, but was so shocked I told the poor boy that I would have to think about it.
I drove back to my apartment and sat in my room for a while and then called all my friends and told them I was going to get married... and then realized that I hadn't told him yet... So I called him and asked him when he wanted to get married... The poor guy thought I was going to say no and had called his mom heartbroken that I was going to reject him...
We went and picked out my ring together and when the ring was sized and ready to be picked up, Rich took my up the canyon for a picnic dinner and asked me to marry him again and gave me the ring.
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
Blogs
I've had this blog for myself for a while, but I use it a lot for my thoughts and I don't give a whole lot of space for just the day to day things the kids do and pictures of them. I've decided to open a second blog where I'll post more pictures of the kids and their day to day accomplishments with less of my personal thoughts clouding up the page... lol!
http://newtonaaaa.blogspot.com/
will be the second blog. I'll put a link to it on the side bar. I'll still post some pictures on this blog on occasion, but that blog I'll give out more freely the website to others to come and check it out. I've been a little more slow to give out the blog addy of this blog since I tend to put more personal reflection thoughts on this one.
There isn't much on it right now, but I've been realizing that the kids are growing up so fast and I am not taking the time to "record" about it through pictures and writing things down- so I hope to be able to start taking more pictures of the kids to put up and share.
http://newtonaaaa.blogspot.com/
will be the second blog. I'll put a link to it on the side bar. I'll still post some pictures on this blog on occasion, but that blog I'll give out more freely the website to others to come and check it out. I've been a little more slow to give out the blog addy of this blog since I tend to put more personal reflection thoughts on this one.
There isn't much on it right now, but I've been realizing that the kids are growing up so fast and I am not taking the time to "record" about it through pictures and writing things down- so I hope to be able to start taking more pictures of the kids to put up and share.
Exercise, eating habits, physical and emotional well-being
Well yesterday went pretty smoothly. Today was okay. A little less enthusiasm from Alex about the morning chores than he had yesterday, but Ashley was still excited.
I went to the YMCA monday and yesterday. I think I'm going to take a rest day today and then go again tomorrow and friday. I do every other day for the weights, but am trying to work myself up to every day on the cardio machines (elliptical or treadmill). I've stalled out at 160 pounds and just can't seem to loose the rest of my weight. I'd love to loose 20 pounds and get down to 140, but if I could even just loose 10 pounds and stay around 150 I'd be satisfied.
I have grown up in such a comfort food culture, that it is hard for me to change my dietary habits and move towards more healthy choices all of the time. I really don't eat extremely badly- I cook a lot of things from scratch and we use whole grains and healthy foods- but I still do use lots of butter and I use sugar in things that I probably should find alternative recipe's that aren't as sweet. The thing is intellectually I can look at food choices and see what it healthier and the reasons they are healthier, but emotionally the pull to make the foods that I enjoy cooking is stronger than the intellectual side. I've tried explaining this to Rich and he just doesn't seem to understand. For him cooking seems to be just a means of preparing food- I don't think he has an emotional connection to cooking that I do. Cooking things that I know how to do and cook without a recipe is part of who I am and it's a part of me that I don't want to give up. I've tried finding healthier recipes to exchange and cook instead, but they don't taste as good and I don't get the satisfaction out of them that I get out of making my families favorite foods. I know I just need to experiment more and find more new favorites.
I also have decided that I will just have to be more active to counteract the calories I consume by making my favorite meals. Cutting out those foods completely may be healthier for my body physically, but emotionally it isn't- so I'll find a middle point and mix the healthy foods with my favorite recipes and exercise more to try to stay healthy that way.
I went to the YMCA monday and yesterday. I think I'm going to take a rest day today and then go again tomorrow and friday. I do every other day for the weights, but am trying to work myself up to every day on the cardio machines (elliptical or treadmill). I've stalled out at 160 pounds and just can't seem to loose the rest of my weight. I'd love to loose 20 pounds and get down to 140, but if I could even just loose 10 pounds and stay around 150 I'd be satisfied.
I have grown up in such a comfort food culture, that it is hard for me to change my dietary habits and move towards more healthy choices all of the time. I really don't eat extremely badly- I cook a lot of things from scratch and we use whole grains and healthy foods- but I still do use lots of butter and I use sugar in things that I probably should find alternative recipe's that aren't as sweet. The thing is intellectually I can look at food choices and see what it healthier and the reasons they are healthier, but emotionally the pull to make the foods that I enjoy cooking is stronger than the intellectual side. I've tried explaining this to Rich and he just doesn't seem to understand. For him cooking seems to be just a means of preparing food- I don't think he has an emotional connection to cooking that I do. Cooking things that I know how to do and cook without a recipe is part of who I am and it's a part of me that I don't want to give up. I've tried finding healthier recipes to exchange and cook instead, but they don't taste as good and I don't get the satisfaction out of them that I get out of making my families favorite foods. I know I just need to experiment more and find more new favorites.
I also have decided that I will just have to be more active to counteract the calories I consume by making my favorite meals. Cutting out those foods completely may be healthier for my body physically, but emotionally it isn't- so I'll find a middle point and mix the healthy foods with my favorite recipes and exercise more to try to stay healthy that way.
Monday, February 05, 2007
Family Home Evening
So we've had lots of struggles with the kids lately about helping out around the house and doing chores and stuff. Tonight for FHE we'll talk abou them and why we have chores and responsibilities and lay down a new plan to help motivate everyone.
I’ve been looking at websites and reading up on different things and ideas that people have about chores and what kids can be expected to do. I think we need to actually look at it as three different levels of “work/chores” so to speak.
1- Individual responsibility- individual chores the kids are expected to do and receive some form of positive encouragement for their individual accomplishment
2- Child led group responsibility- Something the kids are asked to do together and work and accomplish together for a group reward.
3- Family responsibility- larger things that the kids can’t do on their own, more items that we need to accomplish, but by involving the kids in it they learn the reward of working together and accomplishing a job and they learn the skills to do it on their own in the future.
1-For individual responsibility- I’m making new chore charts, I’ve been reading about age appropriate chores for kids, and I know since the kids aren’t doing much now we need to work up and start the better habits and practices for them- so I was trying to figure out some chores that I think it would be reasonable for us to ask them to do.
I think we will have a “family council” of sorts and let them have input on what chores they should be doing.
I was thinking with Alex and Ashley they can have the responsibility of making their bed, putting dirty clothes in the hamper, and putting away their clean clothes. I also thought that they could each have one or two nights where they help clean up from dinner.
With Alyssa I thought we could have her make her bed and put her dirty clothes in the hamper, and I think during the day I would have her help unload the dishwasher. I can start doing that earlier in the day and then it’s all ready to be loaded in the evening.
2-For the child led group responsibility- I was thinking is that the kids need to have an incentive for cleaning up- or it just becomes me yelling and randomly taking away privileges from them and we all get frustrated. They love to play games so much, and I thought if I give them the incentive to clean up before dinner each night- then perhaps we can play a family game each night after dinner/before bed, or read a book together or something? My other thought was that dessert would be dependent on finishing the chores for the day, but that is more of an individual thing and doesn’t encourage them to just work together to clean up the living room- the goal of playing a family game might. Also I don’t know that we need to tie dessert as a reward for doing chores.
3-For the family one was that once a month we could have a “family cleaning” where we choose something that needs to be cleaned up as a family and work on it together- that could be cleaning the garage together, weeding the flower bed, catching up on house cleaning- doing the windows or baseboards or blinds that I never can seem to get to on my own.
Rich asked me where I found the above stuff and I had to tell him that it’s kind of bits and pieces from different places. I was initially looking up age appropriate chores- and came across different chore charts that listed what age appropriate chores different sites recommended. I looked at them and decided ones that I thought would work for our kids. There were actually more chores on the charts for Alex and Ashley, but I thought I needed to work with some simple things first and then add to their charts after the basic habits were started. Most of the sites advocate some form of allowance tied to chores, and I can see the benefit of that, but didn’t want to have all of the responsibilities tied to an allowance (whether monetary or paid in tv/x-box/computer time allowances). So while I was reading through that stuff I knew that I still needed to find some way to get the kids to cooperate and help clean up more general things and make it be a group goal instead of just an individual goal of accomplishing their chore to get their allowance.
Then I started thinking about how to put “clean your rooms” on the charts. For Alex it’s pretty simple and straightforward- the mess in his room is from him, but with Ashley it isn’t as simple. The mess isn’t always from her and it really isn’t fair to expect her to clean up her room all the time on her own when 70% of the mess is from Alyssa and Angela. So I got to thinking about the times when the kids really do clean up well and work together. Usually it’s before we do something and they are motivated to clean up so we can go somewhere or something. Right when I’m making dinner and before you get home really seems to me to be the time for me to motivate them to clean up, and then after dinner the cleaning will be done and we can play games and stuff- the thing is you and I have to be in agreement and willing to sit and play the games or read the book - whatever motivating factor we decide to give them before it is too late and time to get ready for bed.
I was also searching through the LDS site for some articles or something to help me base my lesson on, and I ran across tons of articles on working together as a family on chores and goals and the closeness that that creates which helps as the kids get older and stuff and thought that that is another thing we need to start trying to do more.
So I was trying to figure out which “philosophy” so to speak to try and focus on tonight, and then I thought- well why do I have to choose just one? Why can’t we just separate it into individual, group and family responsibilities and talk about how we have to learn and do things individually sometimes, and as a group other times and with the family- it can be a lot of fun to work together and accomplish a job.
So... hopefully I'll be able to convey to the kids tonight what I've been able to type up. Because on paper it looks good, but I know getting things from paper- to mesh and make sense in kids brains- isn't always easy. ;)
I’ve been looking at websites and reading up on different things and ideas that people have about chores and what kids can be expected to do. I think we need to actually look at it as three different levels of “work/chores” so to speak.
1- Individual responsibility- individual chores the kids are expected to do and receive some form of positive encouragement for their individual accomplishment
2- Child led group responsibility- Something the kids are asked to do together and work and accomplish together for a group reward.
3- Family responsibility- larger things that the kids can’t do on their own, more items that we need to accomplish, but by involving the kids in it they learn the reward of working together and accomplishing a job and they learn the skills to do it on their own in the future.
1-For individual responsibility- I’m making new chore charts, I’ve been reading about age appropriate chores for kids, and I know since the kids aren’t doing much now we need to work up and start the better habits and practices for them- so I was trying to figure out some chores that I think it would be reasonable for us to ask them to do.
I think we will have a “family council” of sorts and let them have input on what chores they should be doing.
I was thinking with Alex and Ashley they can have the responsibility of making their bed, putting dirty clothes in the hamper, and putting away their clean clothes. I also thought that they could each have one or two nights where they help clean up from dinner.
With Alyssa I thought we could have her make her bed and put her dirty clothes in the hamper, and I think during the day I would have her help unload the dishwasher. I can start doing that earlier in the day and then it’s all ready to be loaded in the evening.
2-For the child led group responsibility- I was thinking is that the kids need to have an incentive for cleaning up- or it just becomes me yelling and randomly taking away privileges from them and we all get frustrated. They love to play games so much, and I thought if I give them the incentive to clean up before dinner each night- then perhaps we can play a family game each night after dinner/before bed, or read a book together or something? My other thought was that dessert would be dependent on finishing the chores for the day, but that is more of an individual thing and doesn’t encourage them to just work together to clean up the living room- the goal of playing a family game might. Also I don’t know that we need to tie dessert as a reward for doing chores.
3-For the family one was that once a month we could have a “family cleaning” where we choose something that needs to be cleaned up as a family and work on it together- that could be cleaning the garage together, weeding the flower bed, catching up on house cleaning- doing the windows or baseboards or blinds that I never can seem to get to on my own.
Rich asked me where I found the above stuff and I had to tell him that it’s kind of bits and pieces from different places. I was initially looking up age appropriate chores- and came across different chore charts that listed what age appropriate chores different sites recommended. I looked at them and decided ones that I thought would work for our kids. There were actually more chores on the charts for Alex and Ashley, but I thought I needed to work with some simple things first and then add to their charts after the basic habits were started. Most of the sites advocate some form of allowance tied to chores, and I can see the benefit of that, but didn’t want to have all of the responsibilities tied to an allowance (whether monetary or paid in tv/x-box/computer time allowances). So while I was reading through that stuff I knew that I still needed to find some way to get the kids to cooperate and help clean up more general things and make it be a group goal instead of just an individual goal of accomplishing their chore to get their allowance.
Then I started thinking about how to put “clean your rooms” on the charts. For Alex it’s pretty simple and straightforward- the mess in his room is from him, but with Ashley it isn’t as simple. The mess isn’t always from her and it really isn’t fair to expect her to clean up her room all the time on her own when 70% of the mess is from Alyssa and Angela. So I got to thinking about the times when the kids really do clean up well and work together. Usually it’s before we do something and they are motivated to clean up so we can go somewhere or something. Right when I’m making dinner and before you get home really seems to me to be the time for me to motivate them to clean up, and then after dinner the cleaning will be done and we can play games and stuff- the thing is you and I have to be in agreement and willing to sit and play the games or read the book - whatever motivating factor we decide to give them before it is too late and time to get ready for bed.
I was also searching through the LDS site for some articles or something to help me base my lesson on, and I ran across tons of articles on working together as a family on chores and goals and the closeness that that creates which helps as the kids get older and stuff and thought that that is another thing we need to start trying to do more.
So I was trying to figure out which “philosophy” so to speak to try and focus on tonight, and then I thought- well why do I have to choose just one? Why can’t we just separate it into individual, group and family responsibilities and talk about how we have to learn and do things individually sometimes, and as a group other times and with the family- it can be a lot of fun to work together and accomplish a job.
So... hopefully I'll be able to convey to the kids tonight what I've been able to type up. Because on paper it looks good, but I know getting things from paper- to mesh and make sense in kids brains- isn't always easy. ;)
Thursday, February 01, 2007
The good days
I think after having had bad days, I appreciate the good days so much more. Yesterday Rich stayed home and wasn't feeling very well. Since he was "hogging" the computer I didn't get on here much and since he was around to help amuse the little kids, I got a lot of housework done. It is such a feeling of accomplishment to be able to clean a bathroom (really clean it... I used a toothbrush in the showerstall!!) without any kids yelling or screaming or trashing another room while you were cleaning the bathroom. :)
I've found that the sense of accomplishment that I felt yesterday has carried over to today. I didn't get as much done sine Rich was back at work, but I'm feeling better about what I did do, and focusing on that instead of the things that I didn't get accomplished. My kitchen floor didn't get mopped, but I did vacuum the living room. All the clothes aren't folded and put away, but since I caught up yesterday and actually put clothes away- the three loads that I washed today aren't too big of a pile and they don't seem overwhelming when I think about taking a 1/2 hour this evening to fold and put them away.
Tomorrow may be a bad day again, but I'm going to enjoy my good day today and make a yummy dinner that Rich and I like... the kids will complain- I'm sure (lately they always do) that they don't want to eat what I make, but I'm having a good day and tough cookies to them- but their complaining isn't going to bother me today. They actually like the meal and can eat it even if they would rather have something else today. lol!
I've found that the sense of accomplishment that I felt yesterday has carried over to today. I didn't get as much done sine Rich was back at work, but I'm feeling better about what I did do, and focusing on that instead of the things that I didn't get accomplished. My kitchen floor didn't get mopped, but I did vacuum the living room. All the clothes aren't folded and put away, but since I caught up yesterday and actually put clothes away- the three loads that I washed today aren't too big of a pile and they don't seem overwhelming when I think about taking a 1/2 hour this evening to fold and put them away.
Tomorrow may be a bad day again, but I'm going to enjoy my good day today and make a yummy dinner that Rich and I like... the kids will complain- I'm sure (lately they always do) that they don't want to eat what I make, but I'm having a good day and tough cookies to them- but their complaining isn't going to bother me today. They actually like the meal and can eat it even if they would rather have something else today. lol!
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